I was impressed how violence against women is reaching alarming levels. Not that this had not happened before, maybe these numbers have always been high and just did not appear in the media. But that made me wonder why some men still see their wives, girlfriends and even friends as their property.
Of course we’re talking about sick men. This seems obvious to us. But it is not obvious when one is sick, when one thinks that to hurt, to rape or to kill a woman is a normal thing. It is not! It will never be. Violence against women is old, as old as human existence. Or will you tell me that you think it’s normal for a man to hit a woman’s head with a tassel and take her to the hair-filled cave? The most interesting is how old it is but how strong it is still. And the worst: there is no such machismo on the part of men, in fact, it is even greater in the part of women.
Women are raised to raise children and take care of their homes and their husbands. Yes, we have a strong genetic component since we have the instinct to care. No matter what it is, we like to take care of it. We take care of plants, animals and children. And of men, yes, why not? Until then, no problem. The problem sets in when we think we have no value if we are not doing it. Recently at Big Brother Brazil, many women felt uneasy to see one of the participants, Maria, kneel (literally) at the feet of her boyfriend asking for forgiveness for something she did not even do. Yes, that she had a lot of desire to make (in this case, stay with another participant of the game when the boyfriend in question was eliminated), but that did not succumb. Well, she actually believed she was wrong. And he asked for forgiveness so much that it was funny. She followed the boy around the house, into the bathroom, wanting to justify that he loved him. But he, irreducible, did not surrender. In the end, she’s still in love and he ignores it.
It’s easy to point the finger at girl and say “ah, is valued for running after the guy, he does not deserve you.”Beautiful! But what about us here, I here, you there, are you sure you never did this in your life? He never forgave something he thought was unforgivable, never called when he vowed never to talk to the guy, never begged (and there are several ways to beg) for a man you loved to be with? Even if it meant more pain than love? Yeah, we all do, did or will do it one day. This is because we are taught that, if a relationship goes wrong, it is we who are guilty. If a man fell in love with people, it’s because we gave him a lot of money, and there are even cases of rape, where the woman is accused of being easy, of giving the impression she wanted.
And there are cases of young and disappeared girls. They accumulate the psychiatric and psychological offices of unhappy women in love, in relation to both. Of women who think they have no value if they have no one, a man by their side and who, in fact, are condemned daily by friends, mothers, relatives.
It’s time to think it over. If you have a son, what kind of education are you giving him? You’re saying things like “my son, you can date whoever you want, you can betray because you’re a man.” Are you letting yourself be used by men who do not deserve you, putting your self-esteem to the test? Are you running out of debt in the gym and the aesthetic center for thinking you’re never good enough for a man? Yeah, we need to rethink our role. It is not because they gave us jobs and the right to vote that the whole thing is solved and ready. We are people, human beings and we are seeing other women in full pain and suffering because of the unhealthy relationships of the partners, but mainly, on their part. Being alone does not make you into crap. Yes, the maxim “before only mismanaged” is the purest of truths. No, you are not needy or crazy, or need anything but yourself to be happy.
To love, having a legal partner is great. And we all have the right to look for it. But never under any circumstances should we place our values, our self-esteem in anyone’s hands. Because our life, our experience is what shows our value and not the alliance that we carry or not on the finger.
Think about it! Loving is great, suffering is not part of it.